Broken Plans

Bismillah,

Assalamu'alaikum!

When I was in high school, I used to have a dream. I wanted to be a diplomat. Or journalist. In another specific dream, I wanted to work as journalist in an iconic building (if you are East Javanian, you'd probably know what it is hahaha). I planned to go to a certain college and certain major.

Yet.

I didn't. I couldn't. For some reason, mom talked me into trying another school, a much smaller and almost unknown school. I agreed. I graduated and I entered work life rather faster than any of my friends. Do I regret it? I am not sure. But I am always trying to see it on the brighter side. I was surrounded with good and kindhearted people (always have been, Alhamdulillah), I traveled further, I've got privilege of working even before I graduated and it was actually not far from my dream job (copy writer), and the list goes on.

Then life went on. I almost forgot that I used to dream on being a diplomat or journalist until I discovered a small podcast/talk on instagram about career a moment ago. I am now at a point of my life where I have 'tasted' a lot of things yet accomplished nothing. Is it really nothing? All my life is going to waste now, since I am unemployed, let alone achieving my dreams?

Months ago, I would get depressed if this is how I am going to see my life. If this is the perspective I took to look into my life.

But of course. Allah Al Muhsin. Allah Al Hakim. He is The Best Planner. Allah knows what is best for His slaves. Amidst all of my broken plans along with broken heart (caused of those broken plans, not because of person), Allah guided me to listen one of lecture about life according to Qur'an (indeed, Al Qur'an is the best guidance in this temporary life). It widens my eyes and broaden my mind. Suddenly 1+1 is no longer 2, but it could be 7, then grows into 100, then grows into unlimited. Suddenly, rules make sense. Suddenly I feel so much smaller. Suddenly those broken plans are something that I shall forever be grateful of.

Life, the happy and the sad; the good and the bad, they are all temporary. And they are ALL test. It's a test whether we'd grateful or not, whether we'd be patient or not. To Allah we shall return.